Wisdom

I remember watching Bruce Almighty, and there is a part where Jim Carey ask Morgan Freeman why doesn't God just give you patience and Morgan Freeman said, because that's not how he works. He puts you into situation that develop the patience, don't quote me but it was something like that. Anyway when I heard this I was like wow, another lesson kicked and some questions had been answered.

Flash back to 1984, my cousin had left some books with me to safe keep for him and one of the books was The Book of Moses. I was reading through this book and came upon a ceremony to make one wiser. I read it, thought about it and then gathered the tools to do the ceremony, there were several other ones i coulda done but being wise to me always seemed kinda regal, I don't know maybe it's just me. So I do the ceremony in an open field and go home. When I woke up the next morning I didn't feel any wiser and it kinda just slipped to the back of my mind.

This is where the Bruce Almighty statement comes in, "she don't work like that", she puts you in situations that will make you wiser. The next 27 yrs will attest to that, I have live, I have seen, I have experienced. Someday when I think back all I can do is shake my head and say wow! I am a people watcher and I promise watching folks has been some of the best lessons learned, not to mention some of the most entertaining.

So in the end I am not sure if the ceremony contributed to the lessons I have learned, but it does give me pause to think, be careful what you asked for because once spoken sets you up for the next lesson and you never know how that is gonna turn out or the roads you will have to travel to get to the final destination.

I wouldn't give nothing for the journey cause for sure I am wiser for it.

Nails in the Window

Being an only child and the fact that my sister died as a toddler, coupled with the fact that I didn't live with my mother until I was seven helped to fuel her over possessiveness, hence I didn't get to do much as a child. I couldn't visit friends if they had a brother or father living in the house, I guess she was scared I'd get molested, wow she never had a clue that the boogeyman was a lot closer to home. Any way during the summer of my fourteenth year most of my friends,were sixteen and seventeen and they were going to parties, hanging out and I wanted to go to. So I devised a plan to get me out of the house.

My bedtime was 9:00 p.m. on a Friday night. I would say good-night and place all my stuff animals in the bed so it look like I was sleeping. I would then dress, open my bedroom window and be gone! I would go through the neighbors back yard, climb their fence, hit the alley, run one block to my girls house, pick up the outfit for the evening and be gone. I was able to get away with this for a few months, but as they say all good things must come to an end. As I climbed back into the window one night, there was my momma sitting up waiting on me. Well she didn't beat my butt that night for I am sure if she had I wouldn't have age an hour more, but what she did do is she put several nails in the window and broke off the heads of the nails as she gave me that "I could really beat your ass", look. As I watched her nail the window shut it was like all the air was being sucked out of the room. I have always been claustrophobic and I literally could not breath.

After she left my room I paced back and forth, finally I looked a the nails in the window and the voice in my head said "shoot you can do this". It took me one week to take the nails out, one by one and on Friday night I was gone again. Well when I came home the window was locked, meaning I would have to knock to get in. NOT! I went to the bathroom window off the back porch, took the trash can put it up to the window and climbed in. So quiet not making any noise. I got in my momma's bed, cause she was in mind and went to sleep. So many times my angel's were looking out for me, cause again I coulda died. Boy oh boy the dumb shit we do as kids.

One of the things I am so thankful, I was able to apologize to her before she began her walk as an Ancestor.