Ms. Jing

28 DEC 2009

We are coming to the end of another year, my, my, what a year it has been. I was sitting here this morning doing a little reflecting and I got stuck in a period about seven years ago. Angel was about a year old and after staying at home with her for the first year, I was bored out of my mind, so I decided to go back to school. There is a child development center on the campus and in order for Angel to go to the school without me having to pay for it I had to take a parenting class, that’s where my story begins.

It was in the fall of the year that I returned to school for the life of me I couldn’t understand why I had to take a parenting class, my baby was in his thirties so pretty much I had been a parent for some number of years. As I entered the classroom that first day, I looked around the classroom and all my other classmates were barely in their twenties, some thirties, but only one fifties, me. I don’t remember the lesson just the feeling, like okay, and? Then there was the teacher, Ms Jing. Often I would ask God, why? Why me? The woman was insufferable and I believed she was picking me, singling me out for harassment, I am still not sure that wasn’t part of it. Angel was able to attend this school because at the time she was my foster child, even though she was also my grandchild and she got to go free. This was a blessing for us, we were just starting a business and with the added burden of the cost of child I wouldn’t have been able to return to school and school is what I needed at that time in this journey.

Ms Jing and I bumped heads several times that semester with some of the madness resulting in an appearance before her department head. I felt I was completely right on this issue and I would not back down, and neither would she. Well the department head agreed with me and that battle I won, and I won a lot of them. Ahh, but the war? She won that one, she failed me in her class and that meant for Angel to continue at the school I would have to retake that class and Ms. Jing was the only teacher.

Now I am sure I was a big part of the problem and I had to sit down and talk to me, because I wasn’t gonna take this class a third time. I was gonna have to really pay attention, be on time and all that stuff.

So I did and you know what I actually learned some things. She made us keep a journal that she would read and she made us write about real life things that were affecting our lives, which means she got to know each one of us a little bit better while she made us know ourselves better.

While sharing one day in class Ms. Jing told us a little bit about her early years, if memory serves me correctly, and it might not, but she is from China and little girls didn’t really matter over there. I can remember her telling about sitting in her living room watching her parents at neighbors’ homes socializing. She wanted to go to college but a college education was deemed worthless for a female child and her brother was the elected one to come to America and be educated. I get a little foggy but something happen and her brother for whatever reason was not going to college. I believe monies had already been spent so through her determination she was able to take her brother’s place and that’s how she ended up in America where dreams do come true. I found a new respect for her and I passed the class.

Ms Jing left Valley College and I lost contact with her till one day I was looking through email addresses and came upon hers. I dropped her line so we kinda stayed in touch off and on. I had put up on facebook some pictures of Angel and invited her to see Angel now eight. When she responded she told me she had read some of my blogs and that I was a tough old bird. Hmm a tough old bird, I like that.

Oh yeah and her making us keep a Journal? That was my first blog, Thanks Ms. Jing.

Heaven’s Gate

17 JAN 2010


As I sat on the deck last evening watching the moon play hide and seek among the clouds suddenly a mass of stars appeared giving off an eerie light, at first it looked like an old lady and then a child, a man holding something small in his arms. The image slowly changed to a young woman, an old man and there seemed to several people grouped together as the stars moved on through the sky leaving a trail of what appeared to be tears, now how can the sky cry.

As I sat and pondered this question the image of the old woman reappeared, I could hear her whisper, “listen closely my child”, I felt her more than I heard her and this is what she said. Tell them not to cry for me because I am old and my time has come. Cry for the babies, those that were born and those who will never be born. She said cry for the babies now all alone, cry for the parents that are crying for their babies. Lady Death as been busy for there is a line at Heaven’s Gate. Some souls won’t make it as they continue to roam; most all of them she said can’t get use to the idea that they are dead.

Arrogance and greed planted the seed that will lead to all our destruction if we don’t pay heed. Haiti is strong and again we will rise as the Phoenix from the ashes this time more strong. It is the young that shall lead and education that will set them free. Greed is what has upset Mother Earth’s balance and if not regained will destroy this earth, you must pay attention to the signs, the warning bell has already sounded. Mother Earth is like a cracked plate, keeping putting pressure on her and one day it will break.

Be careful of the dead and the names that the living are using for this catastrophe will last for generations to come.

God Bless Haïti et maintenir que ses enfants fermer nous avons rejoint les ancêtres et la volonté aide hors lorsque nous pouvons.

God Bless Haiti and hold his children close we joined the ancestors and we will to help out when we can.

She pulled her sweater closer with a tear in her eye, “I must go now”, she said as the light grows fainter, Lady Death has been busy and there is a line at Heaven’s Gate.

And My Heart Cried

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YaYa Comas

I was talking with my second oldest grandbaby, one half of a set of twins today. She is now 21 almost 22 and she shared with me her experience in school and how each year got harder and harder for her. I always knew she was having trouble in school, but at the time I didn’t understand her struggle, I do now. She has what so many of our kids have, a learning disability. More prevalent in drug babies than ever before, and my heart cried cause I didn’t know, but I should have.

She shared with me how it broke her heart not to be able to march on that stage with her sister, no prom, or any of the other activities that go along with that mile stone and my heart cried. She shared with me just how hard it was for her in school, she said grandmommie I really tried but I just couldn’t understand, it was like a foreign language. she said I would really be trying to follow the teacher and then something would distract me and I would be lost for the rest of the class, sometimes for the rest of semester and my heart cried.

This is the gift my daughter, their mother left to them, it is so hard in so many ways for drug babies. Learning disabilities are not something new, but with this new age of drugs it is so much more severe. I told her but now you know you can learn and you are not stupid it just takes a little longer for you as it did for me. Sometimes school is not for everybody parents and if you see this help them get a trade because no matter what they have to live and it is way easier on you if they are able to care for themselves.

Learning disabilities are nothing new, but how we handle them can be.