When I was preparing to get married, I started getting all sorts of advice especially at bridal from family and friends. But one of the most interesting "lessons" came from a woman I met for the first time, just a few weeks before the big day. She said, "Honey, whatever you do, don’t ever let yourself become a "make-do" woman." I had no idea what she meant, but of course she was about to explain.
She continued, "men" don’t deny themselves anything. Whatever they want to buy, they buy. Whatever they want to do they do. Meanwhile, there is the wife, making do with her hair not being done, her clothes from yester-year, her nails in need, never had a pedicure, scraping the bottom of her tube of lipstick! Oh, I could go on and on with how "we" make do. And why? Because the car needs fixing, this bill is behind, we have to use our time to take care of this, or take care of that, we’re saving for this, working, cooking, cleaning, raising, etc." She warned me to never become a make-do woman, because she says if you start, it is hard to stop and one could easily find themselves making-do for the rest of their lives.
It’s not good to start something that you do not intend to finish. I vowed, it would never happen to me. I didn’t think much more of the conversation until one day I began to take notice, she was right. Men are a lot better at being good to themselves.
Some call it being selfish, there has to be another word for it. Tell me if you know. Whatever you call it. It will have it’s place. When they want to play ball, or golf, or fish, they go! When they want to buy clothes, or equipment, or video games, or whatever their "thing" is, they buy! Have you ever tried to stop one? Has anyone ever been able to stop one? Let me know! When I look around I see a whole heap of make-do women, married or not, with or without children, they are all over the place! I have decided that I am going to make my best effort to become a "make-time" woman!
I will make the time to do what I need to do to be good to myself, whether that’s a trip to the salon, or the gym, or the mall. This time I’m gonna take a lesson from the guys!
This was sent to me courtesy of "Roslyn". Roslyn sends me lots of women, girlfriend stuff. We started corresponding after our family tragedy the first part of this year and I sure thank her for the food for thought that she sends out. Remember we’ve got to share cause you just might be that light in the tunnel of confusion that we all travel through.
So Ladies how many of us have been there done that. I didn’t think of myself as a "Make Do Women until Forty Days and Forty Nights my soul just opened up. I had finally reached an age when I decided I had given enough of myself over the years to be deserving of taking the time to work on me. I must tell you this was met with great resistance from my family. I have been made to feel guilty for having this attitude by many family members, those that I thought would support me in this search for inner peace, for the run I was making to be a better me. It had me running in circles until one day I decided too heck with them na-sayers, because if not now when. I don’t want to spend the remaining days of my life feeling I had done it somebody else’s way. I no longer feel comfortable being
"A Make Do Women, how about you?
No comments:
Post a Comment